I will start with the obvious miracle. MIKE WAS BAPTIZED!! The service was awesome :) He asked me to speak, and I had a very cool experience. While I was speaking I got to see something no one else did. He sat at the front so only I could see his face. Some were wondering if Mike really was doing this for the right reasons, but as I spoke about the miracle of what he was about to do, I looked and saw him wiping away tears. He is such a special man :) Can't wait to get them sealed to his wife.
Some of you might be wondering or remembering what it is like to be a missionary in the position I am in. By way of talking about the elephant in the room, I have a little over 3 weeks left as a missionary. To be honest, it is a huge flurry of emotions. It is a mixed bag of terror, excitement, and sorrow. There is a lot that I am looking forward to about being home, but last week, I had a moment where I realized this won't last forever. I have given two years of my life to these people, but I feel like I have also given them my heart. Its been a very overwhelming week. You are constantly worrying and reevaluating yourself, wondering and realizing that your aren't giving enough. The imperfections become much more glaring, and more condemning because you have so little time to correct them. For me, its like I am taking my final exam, then forgetting everything you have studied. It becomes a test not of what you have memorized, but of what has truly sunk inside. In short, it becomes a test of what you have learned, but what you have become.
The work of the Lord moves on, and I am realizing I need to spend less time worrying, and more time being grateful. It's been my blessing on my mission to work with and support those who are experiencing things that only Job of the Old Testament would understand. We have and investigator who has 6 kids under the age of 9, who was married to an incredibly evil and abusive man, and is in the middle of divorcing him. That only scratches the surface of what she is experiencing, and we are the ones who she turns to for answer. It gets very overwhelming at times, especially since we are only 19 and 20 years old, and don't have, nor ever could have the life experience to say or do anything to help. It is a miracle to me that this works. It never ceases to amaze me. It is life changing to feel the spirit work through you, and as the words come out of your mouth, see the look on their face of, "Did that seriously come out of the mouth of a kid?" Remarkable. Absolutely remarkable.
I love it all. I am going to miss it more than I think I now realize. My only prayer is to finish well, and to give what the Lord deserves to receive from me.
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