7/20/15

The more you give in to your conscience, the more your conscience will demand of you. The more we give, the more blessed and therefore the more indebted we become. My mission has created a strange relationship between God and I. I have become very aware of the distance between his offering and my own. Between his perfection and my fallen state. I stand in awesome wonder at his goodness and grace and in regretful recognition at my mistakes and short comings. I am very aware of the immense distance between He and I, but I have never felt closer to him in my life. I have been taught through his spirit that he is my Father, and that though my shortcomings make me feel forever distant, His amazing grace makes me feel intimately acquainted with him as a son to his father. 

This truth has been very apparent in my week. I often became distracted by things that have nothing to do with my calling, yet he blessed us so abundantly. It has been 3 weeks since my initial prayers that we would find people who would meet with us consistently, and we have been blessed with an incredible teaching pool. We have a baptism this weekend of a 9 year old girl named Hannah and her 8 year old sister Katie, the daughters of a less active family whom I have come to love! They are the sweetest things in the world. In 2 weeks, we should be having the baptism of Simon Shaub, a 17 year old who is a ton of fun. My story for the week comes from Jennifer, our miracle find from a few weeks ago. 

Jennifer will probably be the death of me. Whenever we are teaching her, she feels at peace, but as soon as we leave, doubt fills her mind and tears her apart, until we meet again and are able to answer her concerns, and the peace returns. Last time we met with her, we tried teaching the Plan of Salvation, and it was quite frankly awful. She did not understand the pre earth life and did not believe it, and the lesson just felt bad. We stopped and pretty much just said "This doesn't feel right. What is going on?" She opened up with a ton of questions, and was amazed at the answers. She felt so good about it she said, "Do you think I could have been born mormon and just didn't know it? I feel like I am a lot more Mormon than Catholic." We responded, "Do you want to know why all of this sounds so familiar?" We pointed to the picture of the Pre Earth Life and said "It's because you have been taught it before." We re taught that portion and she said, "Oh! That makes sense." She know's this is the right path, but again, when we leave, the doubts come back. She came to church, and it was so perfect for her, but she left because she was overwhelmed at how "different" it was. She texted us asking for help and said, "if this is right, I shouldn't feel so confused, correct?" 

I learned an interesting lesson from this. It is human nature to feel uncomfortable or overwhelmed at things that are unfamiliar. For example, the apostles were "terrified" when the Resurrected Lord appeared unto them, because it was so unfamiliar. We should not take that kind of fear for our answer, especially when we have felt peace about it before. If we want to find the truth, think of the times you felt that peace and assurance, and then focus on that. If we entertain our doubts, they will begin entertaining us. Focus on the peace, and there we will find the truth. We explained this too her, reminding her what she feels when she is with us, and she replied, "I know, that is what I am trying to hold on to is that peace." 

Please keep her in your prayers. 

I am excited for another week. They keep flying by and do not look like they are slowing down. I get to go to the Upper Peninsula tonight to blitz the Sault (Pronounced "Soo") Ste. Marie area, and I am PUMPED! I pray that my love for the Lord and his work can be shown through my actions. Love you all!!

Elder Wheat

The view from a street we knocked recently overlooking Grand Traverse Bay